so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize