my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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