Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
how drunk are you?
Several
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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