if i can run in heels then i can drive
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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