Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
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