Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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