Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize