i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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