I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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