@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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