You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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