Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize