Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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