Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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