I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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