We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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