Porn is love you can see.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
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