i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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