omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Randomize