Texts From Last Night

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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll

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  (402): Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll http://tfl.nu/t4li
  Replies (12) Good night (570) Bad night (964) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.

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  (908): My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size. http://tfl.nu/6vyk
  Replies (23) Good night (752) Bad night (4071) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty

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  (918): When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty http://tfl.nu/ybq4
  Replies (19) Good night (1088) Bad night (6580) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"

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  (319): By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection" http://tfl.nu/gcjm
  Replies (14) Good night (5175) Bad night (1005) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip

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  (609): i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip http://tfl.nu/9463
  Replies (10) Good night (3455) Bad night (1451) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.

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  (813): Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house. http://tfl.nu/ztm5
  Replies (9) Good night (3277) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.

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  (605): He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth. http://tfl.nu/s2q9
  Replies (11) Good night (1367) Bad night (5608) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?

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  (970): You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you? http://tfl.nu/r91h
  Replies (2) Good night (951) Bad night (2496) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs

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  (443): also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs http://tfl.nu/bzfk
  Replies (3) Good night (2171) Bad night (788) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.

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  (612): The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt. http://tfl.nu/1yd4
  Replies (4) Good night (2980) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.

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  (973): Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested. http://tfl.nu/rwnz
  Replies (1) Good night (1820) Bad night (538) Order T-Shirt
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  (212): View more from New York

  Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??

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  (212): Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night?? http://tfl.nu/hu0z
  Replies (2) Good night (1305) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Fuck he won the bet

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  (775): He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors (1-775): Fuck he won the bet http://tfl.nu/9wz5
  Replies (18) Good night (2306) Bad night (819) Order T-Shirt
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.

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  (306): I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it. http://tfl.nu/pxhw
  Replies (5) Good night (1853) Bad night (475) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?

  (1-818): View more from California

  I'm about a 7.95

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  (818): On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies? (1-818): I'm about a 7.95 http://tfl.nu/5dnz
  Replies (7) Good night (1038) Bad night (397) Order T-Shirt

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