I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
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It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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