In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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