put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
do nipples grow back?
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