i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize