His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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