why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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