I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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