I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
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