you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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