I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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