Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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