Texts From Last Night

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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?

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  (401): how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much? (617): how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore? http://tfl.nu/k1y1
  Replies (104) Good night (3798) Bad night (683)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.

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  (203): We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad. http://tfl.nu/dqqr
  Replies (23) Good night (4277) Bad night (1317) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.

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  (845): he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after. http://tfl.nu/w4bv
  Replies (78) Good night (5724) Bad night (2606) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.

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  (412): Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life. http://tfl.nu/15a6
  Replies (21) Good night (3501) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.

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  (609): One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em. http://tfl.nu/70jy
  Replies (35) Good night (6584) Bad night (876) Order T-Shirt
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like

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  (571): On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like http://tfl.nu/th56
  Replies (10) Good night (841) Bad night (4493) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"

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  (858): I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits" http://tfl.nu/l1ei
  Replies (29) Good night (4936) Bad night (1359) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...

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  (404): Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february... http://tfl.nu/39i3
  Replies (6) Good night (4284) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this

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  (815): ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this http://tfl.nu/mfxc
  Replies (11) Good night (4516) Bad night (1024) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.

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  (253): Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real. http://tfl.nu/8edz
  Replies (7) Good night (2376) Bad night (715) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?

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  (814): Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison? http://tfl.nu/qn7s
  Replies (4) Good night (1831) Bad night (540) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?

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  (828): Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight? http://tfl.nu/35kg
  Replies (10) Good night (672) Bad night (2520) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him

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  (519): he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him http://tfl.nu/dkoo
  Replies (3) Good night (1123) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?

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  (303): Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night? http://tfl.nu/dyw8
  Replies (11) Good night (1963) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  This is why Helen Keller didn't drink

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  (902): This is why Helen Keller didn't drink http://tfl.nu/wpjw
  Replies (8) Good night (742) Bad night (375) Order T-Shirt

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