That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
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