finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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