he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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