those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize