im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Less talking, more tequila
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize