We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize