It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize