that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize