you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize