Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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