Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
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she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
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I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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