i'm lost and i look like a hooker
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize