he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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