Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
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My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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