dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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