ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize