spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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