This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
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I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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